Peer Pressure

Tuesday, June 13, 2017

I have been feeling a little down lately. Being away from home and being exposed to a different way of life can be so overwhelming. One thing that bothers me is having to deal with peer pressure. I grew up in somewhat of a conservative environment. I don't ever go out partying or clubbing. It's just not something I'm into. Despite that, I'd try almost anything once though. But anyway, my kind of Friday night – though it's not Friday right now – involves curling up in bed and catching up on YouTube videos I've missed or TV shows.

When I first moved here, I was so worried that I might not be able to fit in because I had this image painted in my head that people here would think I'm boring or uptight if I don't go out and party 'til dawn, or that I don't drink. I chose to study abroad because I want to be exposed to a 'new world'. I want to be open to new perspectives and ideas. I want to meet new people. I want to figure myself out.

I realised that I don't exactly put myself out there. I mean, I've always known that but it just hit me harder recently. I am in Australia for god's sake!! I should be making new friends!! Not sitting at home every weekend and be on my computer. Ok don't get me wrong, I have made a lot of new friends especially this past semester. I am honestly so thankful for Hafiq. I swear, if it weren't for this guy, I would have never met new people. Sarah also introduced me to some of her friends, whom I hangout with every now and then. I've also been spending time with Nazurah. I definitely am spending more time with people this semester compared to the previous one.

What I'm trying to say is that I hope by the end of my degree, I can say that I did not just hangout with one group of people throughout the two and a half years I have here. I hope I can say that I put myself out there & meet hundreds of interesting others. Ok after writing that sentence, I feel like I should swipe right more often HAHAHA. If my parents are reading this, I hope you guys don't figure out what I mean by swiping right.

Basically, what I'm trying to articulate in this post is how I'm afraid that I might do certain things only because I've been pressured to do it and that I'd feel like a loser if I say no.

Also, I'm officially done with the sem! I had my paper today and it was alright. Definitely will not ace that though. As for job hunting, yeah... that's still going on. I did go for an induction at this Malay place though. Couldn't justify the cost of commuting from where I live so I quit the next day lmao. I'm trying to go for retail jobs though. Or Woolies. I don't know about you but I'm obsessed with Woolworths HAHA. It just feels like home.

Thought I'd end this post by talking about SZA's new album. AMAZING!! Love Galore, Supermodel, Prom and 20 Something are so good! Also currently obsessed with Bryson Tiller's Run Me Dry!

My family's coming here next week!! I can't believe how fast time has gone by! So excited!!

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